Donde esta Museo del Jamon?

It's been more than a while since House Music Friday brought a proper big room choon to ya, so get ready to hang with the shirtless dudes...



... because that's who's in the big room and that's probably why you're not, let's be honest. I do not enjoy wearing your man-sweat, guy. Put that shit back on. Anyhoo, here's a down and (literally) dirty number from Madrid-based DJ/Producer John Shelvin and his manly grill. Madrid is actually one of the few European cities I've been to. Loved it, but I've never eaten so much ham in my life. They put ham in the coffee in Madrid, I shit you not. What does that have to do with this record? Nothing. OR DOES IT????

John Shelvin - F_ck Me (ysi)

Nope. Absolutely nothing to do with ham. Fooled ya, didn't I? You know, this seems like the kind of tune that would have a sexy video with boobies in it, but that seems not to be the case. Dude was probably too busy gorging himself on ham. Ham, ham, ham. Have a great weekend, kids...

It's been an eternity since the last record, fo sho.

It's a welcome Hip-Hop return in today's episode of Tonegents...



Talib Kweli and DJ Hi-Tek have reunited after several years to release a new Reflection Eternal record... huzzah! It's a heady one, too... not a lot of boom-bap going on, but I'm diggin' it on first listen. Here's one in which we are encouraged to say no to teh drugz to a sorta '70s coolin' out summer jam vibe...

Reflection Eternal - Lifting Off (ysi)

... of course, my only question is... if you're so not getting high, who is it takin' that bong rip at the beginning of the song, eh? EH? Oh, everybody's all quiet now. I'M ONTO YOU! Also, pass that shit... :P

Lying piece of sack of shit slut trashcan scummest dirtbag...

... BITCH! Not you personally, mind you...



... nah, just some bitch Fishbone knew, I guess. Sounds like a lovely gal. If you want my full Fishbone essay, go read this... I'll just reiterate here that Fishbone was the baddest band in the world and leave it at that. From their bonkers debut EP...

Fishbone - Lyin' Ass Bitch (ysi)

Also, I believe it is in direct violation of the Blogulatory Codes to post about Fishbone without some live footage, so here you go...



... just in case you were looking for more video of shirtless black men around here...

LSD... The "L" Stands For Lagos?

Hey, remember last Friday when I said I'd have a special House music-related post for you today. I apparently totally lied. Okay, I just didn't record my DJ set from last night like I thought I was gonna. Might throw it together in Live for you some time soon... keep waiting with breath FULLY BATED! Anyhoo, here's a tune from the best compilation I've picked up in a hot minute...



Soundway Records, a UK re-issue label specializing in rare, vintage funkiness from Africa and South America, are just fucking killing it lately. Every compilation they have put out is gold and this one is no exception. Raw, funky and with enough fuzzed-out guitars to make your head wobbly, The World Ends is, to me, proof that the drugs in Lagos in the '60s and '70s were every bit as good as those in Haight Ashbury. So that may be why some of those cats looked Jimi in addition to James, and the results are musically stunning. Dig it...

The Funkees - Breakthrough (ysi)

Go buy this one straight from the source... and while you're there feel free to pick up pretty much every single thing they've ever put out. You will NOT be disappointed...

House Music Fredag!

House Music Friday is back and never wack...



Once again for HMF we're going with some beardy, flannel-sporting Balearic hippie House from Norway, this time courtesy of Mr. Joachim Dyrdahl, aka Diskjokke. Like the name... like it a lot. Norwegian is a funny language to look at, huh? Actually that whole greater Scandinavia metro area seems like a pretty quirky place, doesn't it? I'll have to go check it out sometime and get my fjord on...

Diskjokke - Flott Flyt (ysi)

If all goes well, I hope to have a nice, House-related surprise for you on Monday. Wait with bated breath. I SAID BATED, DAMMIT!

Your Thursday Blog Post

Are you bored of the Dubstep posts yet? Well, I'm not even close, so here's another one...



Today, music from Mr. Paul Rose, aka Scuba (not to be confused with King Britt, who also used that alias for remixing), who also happens to be the head honcho at the very on-the-rise Hotflush label. This is one of those tracks that rides the line between Dubstep and Drum & Bass... but who cares what you call it, other than good shit? KNAWHADDIMEANYEAH?

Scuba - Eclipse (ysi)

And since it's Margarita Thursday, I will bid you good day...

Mine has flames painted on the side

Bust out your tweed sport jacket with patches sewn over the elbows... shit's about to get highbrow up in this bitch...



Today's post is a bit different in that I have not nor do I have any desire to listen to today's featured album in full. As a matter of fact, I can be pretty sure it sucks just by reading up on the artist and who he hangs out with. But every white, drug-addled, former man-whore rapper in Hollywood has his day, and Mickey Avalon's arrived the day he recorded this genius song. A song with no redeeming values whatsoever, except for the fact that it is fucking awesome. I first heard this one a couple of weeks ago as it played under the closing credits of my new favorite TV show, Hung (if you haven't seen it, get your ass on Netflix like nowzers) and have been frankly obsessed with it ever since. Prepare for the high art, bitches...

Mickey Avalon - My Dick (ysi)

And I really don't think I have anything I could possibly add to that, so see you tomorrow...

Someone just doesn't get it...

I gotta say, I'm a bit irked this morning. In this blogging game, it's not such a big deal to have "someone" ask you to take a post down, but for the first time ever (in almost 900 posts) it was actually the artist who contacted me to do so. I'm used to the record companies not getting it, but this is a new one. As a matter of fact, I've had several artists whom I've blogged thank me for it (which I thought was pretty darn cool). They realize that free publicity for your project is a GOOD THING! That people may actually enjoy and want to buy your music IF ONLY THERE WAS A PLACE THEY COULD BE TURNED ONTO IT! But hey, I'm sure the Simonsound record will sell several million copies without my help (or yours...) so good luck with that, buddy.

/rant

Anyhoo, let's see if this guy appreciates me...



And the guy in question is Mr. Michel Baumann, aka Soulphiction. And his new record on the unfuckwiddable Sonar Kollektiv label is a thick, murky stew of funky flavors. How's that for writing?!?!

Soulphiction - Deranged (ysi)

Okay, the ball's in your court Mr. Phiction... tell me you love me or face a similar catty reply!

With a peeling dome and short 4 pints...

Well, hello there. I have finally returned from a two week hiatus which involved copious amounts of hot dog eating, sweating and having my blood sucked by assorted insects. Ah, summer...



And I return with a track from a new project by Simon James (although not the one from Woolfy) and DJ Format called The Simonsound, because apparently this Simon guy is a bit of an egomaniac. I can see it now.

"Hey, I've got the perfect name for our project!"
"Cool. Hit me."
"The SIMONsound."
(silence)
"What? Something wrong with that?"
"Nah, nah. That's... great... (under breath) dick."
"What?"
"Nothing. Simonsound. Love it."

That aside, the record is a retro, lounge-y, extremely Mooged-out affair that features some interesting covers, such as this take on the oft-sampled Bob James classic...

(REMOVED BY REQUEST FROM SIMON HIMSELF. APPARENTLY HE DOES NOT WANT YOU TO HEAR OR FEEL COMPELLED TO PURCHASE IT. FINE BY ME.)

Okay, no more of these extended breaks in 2010. Goin' hard until Christmas, folks. STRAP IN!!!!!!