How many channels do you get?

After unleashing all that comedy gold on you yesterday, I think I'll keep it low key today. Don't want you to pull a hammy laughing or anything...



I always thought that girls who make music (meaning girl producers) were super cool, basically because they combined two of my favorite things... girls and music. Kind of a no-brainer, eh? So, The Angel, aka 60 Channels was a gal from the L.A. scene who made music... so super cool. She did (and apparently still does) Downtempo and Drum & Bass, and though she never got terribly big it was some pretty decent stuff. To wit...

60 Channels - Laid Back & Eazy (ysi)

'Til tomorrow...

One scary lookin' dude...

What would you do... if your daughter came home... with THIS MAN...



Marcos Valle may not be as well-known as Antonio Jobim, Jorge Ben or the various assorted Gilbertos, but he is just as big a deal in the world of Brazilian music. I'm guessing it's the bad boy look he's rocking up there that turned folks off. People don't react so well to such raw, unbridled aggression, guy. You need to stop taking fashion tips from Marilyn Manson. (Quick note: My first choice for that joke was G.G. Allin, but I decided I'd like someone to get it) Anyhoo, here's an instrumental jam with some hot hot hot bateria...

(DMCA'd?!?! WTF?!?!)

And how about the Olympics being awarded to Rio? I heard that 100M Mugging and Team Kidnapping have been added as demonstration events... BOING!

Phat Beats and Phisticuffs

I don't know how many of you like the boxing, but I gotta say that was some show Manny Pacquiao put on Saturday night. He basically gave Miguel Cotto the soon-to-be-patented "1000 Fist Facial"... check out the loser's grill after the fight...


"So, where does it hurt?" "Yes."

But lucky for Cotto, Las Vegas is the home of some of the best plastic surgeons in the world and they were able to fix him up better than ever. Here's a picture of the new Miguel taken earlier this morning...


"Hey ladies... the line for moustache rides starts to the left!"

So I guess it all worked out pretty well for Cotto in the end... which is nice because he was a good fighter. Just not Saturday when he got his ass SMASHED...



Of course, none of that has anything to do with today's tune, from young British rapper Speech Debelle. This Roots Manuva-produced record made the Mercury Prize shortlist... which is, I believe, a good thing. It's one of the most acoustic and introspective Rap albums you're likely to ever hear... mellow beats and thoughtful lyrics ABOUND...

Speech Debelle - Finish This Album (ysi)

I can't wait for Pacquiao/Mayweather. Literally cannot wait. I just tried waiting and it hurt. Let's DO THIS!

I'm in Playboy and you're not.

(Click to see a bigger version and a video at Playboy.com)

I get some fun perks at my job. This has to be the best one yet.

You're killin' me, Quizno's!

Gah! What the hell happened to Quizno's meatball subs? They used to be so good, but what I just got was a soggy bun full of soggy shit. This world's goin' to Hell in a handbasket, I tells ya!



So yeah, it's a good thing that Floating Points' music is a lot better than his artwork, because... damn... that's worse than the sub I just ate. Super-vibey slowed down House goodness... wait for the bassline...

Floating Points - Truly (ysi)

Have a great weekend and stay away from the meatball...

Nerds don't do Playboy shoots... or do they?

I have been up to my tits in new Dubstep records all day... so here's some obscure French '70s Funk...



There is very little information out there about Ben & The Platano Group, but really... who wants to fill their head up with useless things like "facts" and "knowledge". That shit's for nerds. Oh, wait. I'm a nerd... hmmmm... Anyhoo, most of the album funks harder than this one, but this is where the shuffle landed and everybody loves a little "wakka-wakka" guitar, no?

Ben & The Platano Group - Culzean (ysi)

So that's all well and good, but certain things are better. Like this video. I'm the only person that talks in it, just so's ya know... and not to be a dick about it, but... yes, my job is better than yours. Suck it.

Super heavy metal

Now here's some shit an old band geek like me can really get behind...



I would be talking about the Hypnotic Brass Ensemble, straight outta Chicago. And just like yesterday's act, the name tells you exactly what you need to know... except they coulda replaced "Hypnotic" with "Dayum Fonkay". But either way... you got 8 horns and a drummer. Oh, and that album title is no joke... they are all actual (half) brothers, sons of a Jazz musician (no, really?) whom I had never heard of and won't pretend to in order to seem cool. Get ready for a brass-gasm...

Hypnotic Brass Ensemble - Venus (ysi)

And here's an example of why both this band and NYC are very, very good things...



Yeah, if that doesn't float your boat... well then, I hope your boat sinks...

Funky beats and idle threats

Sometimes the name of an act tells you exactly what you are in for...



All Good Funk Alliance are to funky Breaks what Inland Knights are to funky House. The kinda-under-the-radar guys who are both prolific and consistently awesome. Like the Knights, these dudes simply do not put out a bad track, even though they put out a heck of a lot of tracks. It's called being good at music. The beat on this jam is crispy like bacon, yo...

All Good Funk Alliance - Swing The South (ysi)

And as I alluded there's plenty more where that came from, so get at it. Also, get out your text message device and vote for Chelsea Lately for the People's Choice Award for Best Talk Show! Text "Vote" to 24475. Do it! DO IT! DO IT OR I'LL POST NOTHING BUT KENNY G. AND MICHAEL BOLTON! DON'T MAKE ME GO THERE! Seriously, don't make me...

That's Dr. Kode9 to you!

I hope none of you are sick of the Dubstep yet, because I'm not even close...



Kode9, aka Steve Goodman (which is not nearly as Techno), was one of the first Dubstep artists I ever heard, so... well, actually there's not much more to that. He was one of the first ones I heard. So yeah. Anyhoo, he's the founder of the extremely cool Hyperdub label and also holds a Ph.D. in philosophy... which I'm sure helps him immensely in... some way. If you dug the Joy Orbison record from a few weeks ago, I'm sure this one will also make your pants happy...

Kode9 - Black Sun (ysi)

Here's Dr. Goodman showing off all that brainpower and pontificating on stuff via XLR8R..



Smart guy. Top tune. 'Til tomorrow...

Rollin' with my homies

House Music Friday is keepin' it in the family today...



I've mentioned before that I have friends that are far better at music than I am, and here's one of 'em. Sebastian Ciceri is his name, and pimpin' is his game. Well, not really, but that was a dope rhyme, yo. Homey is a crazy skilled bass player and electronic beatmeister, and his latest release is 100% dancefloor goodness... is it breaks-y house or house-y breaks? Either way, if I told you it was Plump DJs or Stanton Warriors, you would believe me, that's how fat these beats is...

Sebastian Ciceri - Groove Nation (ysi)

You need to now proceed to his website and buy it!

While you're there, check out Seb's "Moonlit Heavy" releases for a more cinematic experience and the special secret photo section for hot man-on-man action. Okay, maybe I made the second part up... have a great weekend, peeps.